When it comes to celebrity sex tapes, you kind of have to admire John Edwards’ balls. Wait, that came out wrong. You have to admire John Edwards’ penis. No, that’s not it either. You have to admire the chutzpah that allows a man who is in the public eye to perform on camera with someone who isn’t his wife. Which is exactly what happened, and why we have a John Edwards sex tape.
If that weren’t enough, and it would have been plenty for your average celebrity sex tape, it’s shot by his campaign’s official videographer (which, incidentally, means that the John Edwards sex tape is high quality; it’s in focus and well lit) who is also carrying his illegitimate baby.
I think to fully appreciate the brazenness of what John Edwards (and by extension, John Edwards’ penis) did, you have to appreciate how much he had to lose if the sex tape ever became public, as they so often do. He was a democratic vice presidential candidate who was making a run at becoming the presidential candidate, and it looked like he had a good chance of actually getting the nod.
Now, there are presidents who can get away with being raging sex fiends, and I’m looking at you JFK and Bill Clinton, but when the key part of your campaign is your good looks and appeal to women and you’ve made your family a key part of your image, well, a sex tape is probably a bad idea. John Edwards’ sex tape is proof enough of that.
Of course, if you have an immensely sympathetic wife who is suffering from cancer and you decide to film yourself banging your mistress, well, you damn well better have iron down below.
John Edwards sex tape actually shows that he performs pretty admirably in front of the camera, but like all things in this life, there is room for improvement. Edwards is fit for a man of his age, but like everyone, a little help in the bedroom department wouldn’t be unwelcome.
The best way to insure that you’re sex tape ready is to use Maxuvia, which will give you rock hard erections, a raging sex drive and increased stamina. This will come in handy if you decide to pull a John Edwards and film a sex tape. Just do us all a favor and do it with your wife and not some random camera handy hussy.